This is my last day aged 47. Too old to skateboard, too young to vote Tory, that's me.
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Coronation Street Live...why? I mean, why live, not why Coronation Street. I know it's a gimmick designed to get viewers but what's the point? They've had a tram crashing off a viaduct into a shop - isn't that enough of a gimmick in the first place? It was very good incidentally but it won't make me watch Corrie regularly like I used to. And I can just picture lots of first-time viewers in the south east watching it and thinking 'a tram? Heavens, how deliciously northern' and then going back to EastEnders and watching it and saying 'an integrated token black family, how deliciously BBC.'
But I just don't see how it is enhanced in any way by making all the actors do it live so there is more chance of mistakes. It's not like watching a play on a stage for instance.
During my time on The Sun it was considered de rigueur to watch the soaps so that we would know who was who in various page leads and splashes about them - remember the Ken and Deirdre saga when she had an affair with Mike? Great stuff.
Mind you, if we ever used the phrase de rigueur Kelvin would sack us instantly.
But turning back to the soaps occasionally is quite a culture shock though at least Rita, Ken and Deirdre are still in Weatherfield. Aren't they?
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My daughter is, quite probably, going to be a student next year and quite possibly in Manchester where trams drive off viaducts into cobbled streets.
And though not everyone here will agree with me on this, if she ever decides to go on a protest march against this - or indeed any - government that decides to treble the cost of education, then I will be bloody proud of her, even if it turns into a riot.
I've already let my 14-year-old daughter protest outside a fur shop. And I hope they all become militant, and angry, and agitate about anything that they feel is unjust, unfair or wrong. It's their right and we should all do it more often. Even if we just do that Network thing of opening a window and shouting out 'I'm mad as hell and I'm not going to take this any more.'
Watching Charles and Camilla in that ridiculously ostentatious car (what's the mpg on that, your royal greenliness?) in their finery waving at the rioters while getting pelted with paint was quite the funniest thing I've seen in years on a news report. 'And you're an anarchist you say? How lovely, did you come far?'
And when that police chief said protesters were lucky not to get shot, I thought, blimey, is this a college campus in 1960s America or something? My mate commented: 'Have I woken up in Burma?' It really is that ridiculous.
Don't go moaning about how dangerous it was for our heir to the throne. Compared to being a Princess in a car driven by a drunken Frenchman, it wasn't really that bad was it?
Besides, he went on to watch Susan Boyle, N-Dubz, Take That and Jack Whitehall (who's even posher than the Queen) so an even greater ordeal was yet to come. And then he went home to bed with Camilla so you could argue the riot was the best bit of the whole evening for him.
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I get great enjoyment reading all the comments in the Daily Mail, Telegraph and indeed on Facebook about how awful these students are, how stupid they are and how they obviously don't deserve a free education. Particularly from all those readers who did enjoy a free education, didn't grow up texting and yet still can't tell the difference between 'they're' and 'their' and 'there.' Typos are one thing. Bad grammar something else.
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I'm going to spend my birthday in Suffolk with my family and come back in such a nice mood that tomorrow's blog will be all sweetness and light. There there...Solly
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