You know what I really hate? When Jeremy Paxman asks a question right at the end of University Challenge and the gong goes and he doesn't have the courtesy to tell us the answer.
No? It's just me then.
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I've just seen a bit of a programme on BBC2 about pottery and the narrator said 'pottery is almost as old as we are.' Well I'm 48 and I could swear pottery is, at the very least, over 50 years old.
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It seems perfectly acceptable for newspapers to accuse Liam Fox of lowering the defences of this country by allowing his mate to go with him on official ministry trips.
But let's face it, what they can't quite bring themselves to say is what they really want to write, in very big letters, which is this: Is Dr Fox gay?
They are hiding behind the usual nudge, nudge innuendo they often do in these cases - or as some hacks call it, up your endo. You know the sort. Phrases like 'very close friend' and putting words like 'special advisor' in parentheses.
No we're not talking about Dr Fox, the DJ who was once duped by Chris Morris on Brass Eye into saying that paedophiles' DNA had more in common with crabs than 'you and me'.
I'm talking about the shortish politician who once allowed the papers to hint that he'd shagged Natalie Imbruglia and who is now in trouble for taking his best man with him on numerous official foreign trips.
Yes, that's right. His best man. Just a few months ago. Which proves there's no way Liam Fox could be gay. I mean, gay people wouldn't marry someone just to cover up their homosexuality would they?
Of course the sexual preference of a politician shouldn't matter in this day and age, and largely it doesn't.
Not even when a person might be gay but goes to extraordinary lengths to appear heterosexual. I believe some people call this Simon Syndrome (or perhaps The Ex-girlfriend Factor).
But Liam Fox has voted or abstained on various votes on gay adoption, lowering the age of consent for homosexuals and others. If he is gay, then he's gone to incredibly homophobic lengths to cover it up.
And IF he is gay but found to have covered it up in order to progress his political career and let his chum go away with him, then that would be a very serious breach of trust.
Some of his closest friends are suggesting that it's nonsense to suggest Dr Fox is gay. These friends haven't been identified. For all I know they could be Robbie Williams, Sol Campbell, George Clooney and William Hague.
David Cameron has recently shown that he can be quite pro-equal rights for homosexuals. Well, he went to Eton so we shouldn't be too surprised.
My guess is that Fox will be confirmed as a raging heterosexual but hung out to dry for letting his mate Adam claim to be a 'special adviser.'
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I am a little sad that Sarah Palin will not stand for President as it may mean the end of the wonderfully satirical impressions of her by Tina Fey. It's also the only funny thing on Saturday Night Live for years.
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I know I really, really dislike Halifax ads where they get social misfit staff members to sing but in the latest one - where they murder Walking on Sunshine - there's a little snippet in which the words Marry Me are spelt out on a Scrabble board.
And since that is the way I proposed to my wife (the current one!) then I find it hard to hate the ad completely.
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I've become a touchline dad. My son has started playing for an under-13 team which has just formed and is in the bottom division. So far he has played four games and they have lost 12-2, 4-0, 13-0 and 8-1. I have already started to lose my temper, not at the boys but the other parents, but I am holding it in. Particular against the mums who shout 'mark up' to our lads when it's OUR goal kick.
Instead, me and a private investment banker called Simon (who also has a Spurs season ticket) move quietly away from the others, have a sneaky cigarette, and discuss the EU debt crisis and Harry Redknapp's latest strategy. I never thought being bored to bits by economics would be so cathartic but it's saving my blood pressure from exploding.
They think it's all over...it is now - Solly
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